Post Malone’s “Wow.” Song Review

Hello, I’m MusiCommentator, and Post Malone released a single at the end of 2018.  So, by music law, the song had to reach the Top 5 of the Billboard Hot 100 charts.  That means I have to talk about it.

I know that intro makes it sound like I don’t like Post Malone’s music, but the opposite is actually true.  While some of his music does sound basic, I feel that he is a refreshing voice in the trap scene, as almost every melody he creates is catchy, and most of his music sounds incredibly appealing.  He’s not the most lyrically or technically complex, but he’s good at what he does.  I did a review of his hit single “Sunflower” with Swae Lee earlier in the year, so you can check that out if you want to see more of my thoughts on him, but that song is demonstrably more pop than this new single “Wow.” so let’s see if Post Malone made another great hit.

Said she tired of little money, need a big boy

Right off the bat, this line makes me incredibly uncomfortable, because I do not want to think of Post Malone as a “big boy”.

Shawty mixing up the vodka with the LaCroix, yeah

If a girl is drinking LaCroix, you probably don’t want to be with her because it shows she has bad taste.  You can argue with me over this in the comments, but we all know the truth is that LaCroix is garbage water.

I got a lot of toys, 720S bumpin’ Fall Out Boy

A Fall Out Boy reference in a rap song?  Quite odd to hear, but I can’t say I’m opposed to it, considering they’re one of my favorite bands (Shameless plug: check out my Every Fall Out Boy Album RANKED (Worst To Best) here).  But, I guess if he’s listening to Fall Out Boy, maybe Post Malone doesn’t have bad taste after all…unless he’s listening to “M A N I A”, then his taste is still terrible.

You was talkin’ sh*t in the beginning (Mm-mm)
Back when I was feelin’ more forgivin’ (More forgivin’)
I know it p*ss you off to see me winnin’ (See me winnin’)

Most people I know are fans of Post Malone, or at least don’t hate his music, so I don’t know who could possibly be mad about seeing him winning.  If anything, people will like it because that means he can make more good music.

Hunnid bands in my pocket, it’s on me
Hunnid deep when I roll like the army
Get more bottles, these bottles are lonely
It’s a moment when I show up, got ’em sayin’, “Wow” (Wow, wow)
Hunnid bands in my pocket, it’s on me (On me)
Yeah, your grandmama probably know me (Know me)
Get more bottles, these bottles are lonely
It’s a moment when I show up, got ’em sayin’, “Wow” (Wow, wow)

This acts as the hook for the song, and I’d say it’s a pretty good hook.  There’s nothing too special about the lyrics, but it’s pretty catchy, and while catchiness doesn’t always make a song good, a brag song like this needs a catchy hook or it’s pointless, so the hook dutifully serves its purpose.  However, I think now would be a good time to bring up that I find it odd how I find parts of the first verse more catchy than the chorus, like the “G-Wagen” part.  I guess this just goes to show how much a knack Post Malone has for concocting earworm melodies.

750 Lambo in the Utah snow (Skrrt)
Trunk in the front like that shit Dumbo, yeah

So the car he’s referencing has the trunk in the front of it, so that part of the simile makes sense, but is it implying that Dumbo has “trunk in the front”?  I know he has big ears, but usually trunk on something alive means fat, and it’s usually in reference to butts, so I’m not sure whether to be confused or uncomfortable at this analogy.

Cut the roof off like a nip-tuck

Okay, I know I can definitely be uncomfortable at this simile.

Me and Dre came for the…

So this is a reference to one of his earlier songs “Takin’ Shots”, the original line being “Me and Dre came for the pum pum”, but I don’t know why the line cuts out like this in the song.  The line fits the rhyme scheme, so why does it just turn to a weird vocal modulation?

Before I dropped Stoney none of y’all really cared (Cared)
Now they always say, “Congratulations,” to the kid (Kid)

This is a good line, because its a clever reflection on his fame.  “Stoney” was the album that got him famous, and the most popular song from it was “Congratulations”, so the way he words this line turns it into some quality wordplay.

Always goin’ for it, never punt fourth down
Last call, Hail Mary, Prescott touchdown, ayy

This is another good bit of wordplay, as he compares his all-or-nothing work ethic to the risky “Hail Mary” maneuver in football, where Dallas Cowboys quarterback Dak Prescott threw a nearly full-field shot to earn the winning touchdown.  This is the extent to which my sports knowledge goes, so I hope I don’t come across any more sports references in this song.

Overall, I’d say this is nothing more than an average Post Malone song.  The lyrics are nothing too special, all brags pretty much, and the wordplay is hit-or-miss.  The beat is like the lyrics in the fact that it is pretty catchy, but it’s not anything special.  This isn’t a bad song, but it feels more like a deep cut off of “beerbongs & bentleys” than a single.  Again, it’s not bad–I mean, I’m not going to say that it isn’t a good casual listen–but I’ve heard better from Malone.  Considering this, I’d give this track a 3 out of 5.  Do you agree?

Thank you for reading my “Wow.” song review.  If you liked this review, make sure to follow my website, Twitter, and Instagram, like this post, and be sure to check in to read my future reviews.  Also, if you have something you want to see me review, tell me in the comments.  Until then, keep on listening to good music! I know I will.




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